Lighten Your Load with a Pleasant “No” During the Holidays
During the holidays, many of us walk a very thin line between busy and overcommitted. Holidays or not, at times, we all have to say “no.” Saying “no” doesn’t have to be an arduous, unpleasant ordeal; it can be a direct statement of your thoughts and desires, delivered honestly and professionally.
Be firm, fair, and nonjudgmental.
There should be no doubt that your “no” means “no.” Not “maybe.” Not “I’m not sure.” But “no.”
You don’t have to give lengthy explanations or excuses for your answer. People have the right to ask for your help, and you have the right to say “no.”
Let the facts speak for themselves.
Show rather than tell. When delivering a “no,” reinforce your decision with the numbers and results in black and white. There is a reason for your response, right? Support what you say with specifics if you’re so inclined.
Offer alternatives and exceptions for which you’d change your mind.
If you can’t help the other person, suggest alternatives. Consider the results the requester is seeking and think of other ways to meet those needs or criteria. What you’re saying is that at this time and under these circumstances, you’re saying “no,” but at another time and under different circumstances, you might say “yes.”
Before you say "yes," identify why.
Rather than overload yourself with low-priority commitments, consider your goals. Ask if this particular cause, task, or event fits those goals. Why is this person asking you to volunteer—because only you have the necessary skills? Or, because you’re the only person who would say yes? Think of your "no" response as a "yes" response to spend your time elsewhere.
The holidays don’t have to be harried—unless you let others dictate your hours. Communicate what’s on your mind in a pleasant but firm tone so you can say yes to the most important people, places, and priorities.
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