Booher BanterBusiness Communication Consultant

I’m wrapping up my 30-tip series on “Opening Closed Minds,” a topic that was prompted by Tariq Zohair’s question, “How can we open closed minds—people who do not want to listen to any arguments or logic?” 

Lower others’ guard with graciousness. 
Alcoholics Anonymous and hundreds of other self-help groups can verify this truth:  You cannot motivate people from the outside; their motivation has to be internal.  People are more motivated to believe you, help you, or at least get out of your way if they like you.  Avoid an adversarial relationship.  Be gracious.

Provide opportunity for a trial-run. 
Cereal companies don’t make us spend $4.89 on a box of new flakes, nuts, and fruit.  Instead, they send us a bowl in the mail to taste before we have to plunk down our money.  Create ways for people to give your idea a low-risk trial before making an irreversible commitment of time, money, or reputation.  The lower the risk, the more likely they’ll take a step in your direction.  Never be afraid of their asking, "What have I got to lose if I go along?"

Note the difference between selling an idea and motivating people to act. 
In "selling" something—an idea, a product, an action—the focus is on the seller’s efforts and success.  What’s in it for the other person.  In "motivating," the focus is on the other person’s attitude and benefit:  What’s in it for them.  The subtle difference implies different methods, language, timing, and attitude.

If you’ve missed any of tips 1-27, you can find them in our archived blogs, or if you have a question of your own, write me at askdianna@booher.com. Good luck with getting through to your own “tough crowd.”

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