Booher BanterBusiness Communication Consultant

“How can we open closed minds—people who do not want to listen to any arguments or logic?”  This question came into my in-box at askdianna@booher.com from one of our readers in Pakistan. This week I’m sharing Tip #25 in this series on how to get through to people who are difficult to reason with.

25)  Ask for the reasoning behind someone’s counter claim. 

Don’t argue against the wind.  Let’s suppose you present a plan for providing computer maintenance service to a customer who says, "It’s too expensive."   You respond, "Not really, when you consider the X feature."  The customer listens and then responds, "But it is much more than we wanted to pay."  And you say, "Well, that may be true, but . . ." 

You get the picture—arguing over a vague assumption.  What does the customer mean by expensive?  What is his or her reasoning?  How did the customer decide what should be a reasonable price?  When you get the answers to those questions, you’ll have something specific to work with.  If the comment "too expensive" is based on the amount of the customer’s budget, you’ll know to spend your time figuring out how to help the person finance the service with that budget.  If the comment is based on a comparison of your price to that of competitors, then you’ll spend your time telling how your service differs from theirs.

Take another example:  A boss says, "We can’t change that policy because people would get angry."  You can’t deal with that unless you know the boss’s reasoning—why he or she thinks people will get angry. 

Of course, be sure to ask for the other person’s reasoning in a nondirective, nonchallenging way:  "The way we set our price is to determine X, then Y, and then add 10 percent for Z.  How did you set your budget figure for this service?  Let’s see if we’re on the same wavelength, or if we’re comparing apples to oranges here."

To argue without knowing the basis of assumptions is a shot in the dark.

Share and Enjoy

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Posted at 2:10pm in Communication—Interpersonal, Communication—Sales, General Communication | Permalink | Add Comment » |